Normal isn't enough

Yesterday morning I was about to take a shower at the gym and had already kinda slipped into "shower thoughts" mode. It dawned on me that these days I can never finish a workout until I'm absolutely exhausted. Like the out of breath, covered in sweat, and sometimes shaking kind.

And I didn't used to be this way.

I guess maybe within the last year I started to add "finishers" to my workouts. They are great for conditioning and fat loss, but I also like them because they just make me feel like I DID something. And yeah, lifting heavy stuff is definitely "doing something" but for me it's just not enough anymore. Like when I used to go to the gym with my husband we'd work on the big lifts first, then do some other accessory stuff, and that was pretty much it. He preferred to train like a bodybuilder and would focus on things like biceps and triceps. Which I may do from time to time, but I mostly focus on strength and use more functional movements. So we'd get done with everything and I would just stand there like "That's it?" I'm not sweaty or tired. I need to do more. So I'd go jump around and do burpees and stuff. Get all the gas out of the tank.

At the end of every lifting workout I'll do a mixture of these

Burpees
Jump rope
Snatches
Kettlebell swings
Box jumps
Squat variations
Thrusters

Now that I have access to such an awesome gym I'm throwing other things in like

Sprints
Sled pushes
Tire flips
Battle ropes
Rowing

Or even when running I'll go for an all out sprint for the last .20 mile

Yesterday was really awesome and it went something like this

Rope climbs (3)
A shit ton of pull ups and negatives
Push ups
Cable rows
Upside down kettlebell shoulder presses
Dips (PURPLE band! Next is unassisted for reps)
Farmers carry #35 x2

Then
Burpees x10
Rest 10 seconds
Snatches x10
Rest 10
Jump rope x30

Repeat aaaaand done!


I might be crazy or just a glutton for punishment but I love it when I'm struggling through those last couple reps and then the awesome feeling I get after finishing them. I can't just do a normal lifting session anymore - I have to leave feeling like I gave it everything I got

Start now

I'm pretty tired and sore this morning. I took a hot bath and it helped me feel better but I'm about to go to work... and moving around all day + sore muscles = not fun.

I had this conversation with my husband as I was making dinner ... he was complaining about his weight and I told him to go to the gym. He was like "yeah I dunno... I'll start Monday" Why? If you don't feel good about yourself then start right away. Last week I was getting over a bad cold, after being snowed in for 5 days, after being injured for a month - and I said that's enough, I have got to change something. I ate way too much crap and was inactive for far too long. So last Friday I went back to eating the way I used to - not perfect, but decently healthy. I stopped eating whatever I wanted and began talking myself out of cravings and mindless eating. Eating more protein. Eating more real and home cooked foods vs convenience foods. I'm eating a couple pieces of candy at night vs gorging on sweets all day. I have been exercising with a passion. And I feel pretty damn good so far.

For me it's about being better. This is not so much a diet and more of just being mindful of what I eat. I'm trying to use my intuition and eat when I need to, not eat when I want something. I'm not gonna be perfect and that's ok, because I do love food. I just want to do better

I am taking a rest day today because I'm uncommonly sore. Done a barbell complex and a really intense upper body day this week and I'm feeling it. Tomorrow I'll be running and maybe on Sunday too.

PSA - I can now do burpees with full range of motion and no pain. I'd say at this point I'm nearly 100% over my back injury. Sometimes I still feel a twinge but it's minor and not even related to exercise.

Ready to go

Not much to say right now other than it's good to be back in the gym. I went twice this week, the first time I felt pretty weak but today was a little better. Also went for a run yesterday.

I wore this tank top for leg day. This just about sums up my philosophy.

The pants are feeling quite tight at the moment, think it stems from my lack of activity last week plus lots of sugar and bad food. Between being sick and wanting smoothies/sodas to soothe my sore throat, we also got our easter box from mother in law so... yeah. But I think in a few weeks I'll feel slimmer again.

Despite feeling weak and fat, I will say it feels great to be moving again.

Tomorrow I go to Philly to run the Hot Chocolate 15k. My first non virtual race of the year. I am apprehensive about being in a big city and therefore have done alot of planning but I'm also excited to see some different stuff. I have a feeling this will be a good race. I have been feeling great on my longer runs lately.

A long and healthy life

In the last 2 years I have been on a journey to better health and well being. And during this time I have heard many success stories and testimonials from complete strangers who have made changes for good health. Today I got to hear another - and it came from none other than my dad.

My dad was pretty active when he was young. He grew up on a farm in Kentucky so he was no stranger to a hard day's work. During his adult life he played basketball alot and when he wasn't doing that you could usually find him swimming. He was an engineer for 30+ years, and like most Americans he packed on some pounds as he got older. His diet has always been pretty good because he grew up in a time of few processed foods, therefore he loves to eat fresh fruits, veggies, and meats. The problem is - he's a big guy with a big appetite so he eats way too much. My mom said he used to order 2 dinners any time they would go out to eat. Yikes. Finally ...he has been a lifelong alcoholic. After nearly dying from alcohol poisoning twice he has kept his drinking to a minimum. He will be 80 this year (my mom is 71, I was a late baby) so he's had his share of injuries and health issues. 

Despite dealing with a lifetime of alcohol addiction and a ugly divorce, he keeps on truckin along every day. He lives alone in a crappy apartment and works as a pizza driver. Yet he maintains a positive attitude. He's always friendly and sociable with his pizza customers and will stay until 1am scrubbing dishes and taking out the trash while the 20 year olds stand around and complain. He swims every day and spends his spare time working on his old cars with a mechanic friend of his. He is one of the most active 80 year olds I have known, second only to his 84 year old sister who still plays basketball. 

My aunt, my dad and me -2009

When I talked to him this morning he mentioned to me he has lost about 10 lbs. He's already pretty active so I wondered what he had done to lose the weight. He said he has been eating less - a necessary change for him since he does tend to overeat - and he has also been much more active this summer. He's spent alot of time fixing his cars, going to junkyards and hauling around big heavy car parts and what not. Being a mechanic forces him to bend, stretch, and support his entire body as he gets up under those cars. He's using all kinds of muscles in his body just to do this type of work. He swims every day, sometimes twice. And you would think a pizza driver doesn't do a whole lot, but he has to help out in the kitchen when he's not driving and he helps close the store. Alot of manual labor involved there, and he'll be the first one to volunteer to do the grunt work. 

Then he said this - losing a little bit of weight and all that hard work has made him stronger. He can now do all of these things with much more ease. He feels better, stronger, and is able to tolerate the summer heat much better.

I was thrilled to hear my dad say these things. For someone who is almost 80 and has hit rock bottom before, just hearing him say this made me incredibly happy. He says he delivered a pizza to the nursing home in town and saw other people his age who loved it there because everything was done for them. This idea is unacceptable to my dad. He is happiest when he can stay busy and do things for himself. But he fears one day he will suffer an injury or a health problem and that it will all be over. And yes, one day it will happen. But I told him that in order to stay out of that nursing home as long as he can, he just needs to keep on doing exactly what he's doing. Be active. Do things for yourself. Keep on working your job and tinkering with your cars. People who are sedentary are usually the ones who wind up with injuries and health complications. By using his muscles he is strengthening his knees, back, shoulders, etc so he is less likely to injure them. He's keeping his heart and lungs healthy so he can stay out of that nursing home. He's still ridiculously intelligent - he'll talk about mechanics or science for 10 minutes and I have no idea what he's talking about because it's so beyond me. He's doing the best he can do with his life. I'm really proud of him.

I feel this is a lesson we can all benefit from. If we stay active into our old age, not only will we be able to do things for ourselves but we will still be doing the things we love, instead of sitting in a bed hooked up to a bunch of tubes. Our minds will still be sharp. We'll still be sharing stories with our families. 

I hope I'm still active when I'm his age, and I'm gonna try my best to make sure I can be.

Viking code

I'm getting used to this morning thing!! I'm 2 out of 3 for morning workouts this week. Planning on being up early for some strength training tomorrow morning.

It's definitely putting me in a much better mood. I'm much cheerier and there's more of a "spring in my step"

Spartan Race posted in their blog about the Virginia Super. The title made me laugh - "Virginia - Home of THAT Course" Yes. It's like 3 months away. I'm scared. I'm just going to go climb a bunch of hills and pray. Next weekend I'll probably go do some hill training.

This weekend I won't be doing anything crazy. We're going camping up in South Carolina. I wanted to go to the mountains but the stars didn't align on that one. So instead we're going to go chill on a lake in SC. My husband can fish and I think there's even a running trail I can go bounce around on. I love camping so I'm really looking forward to it - sunshine, on the lake, trees everywhere, campfires, smores, and sleeping underneath the stars. These are the things I love!

So I found this little Viking themed message...

This is truly how I try to live my life. I feel it applies to fitness in a big way - because fitness is a way of life. So, this applies to both my fitness mentality and my everyday life.

"Strength is life - for the strong have the right to rule"
Fitness - You train to be stronger. Once you have become stronger, you are able to conquer your goals and reap the rewards of your work.
Life - I try my best to be strong in all situations. Things like fear, stress, sadness, criticism, and opposition can weaken our spirits. Be strong of heart and rise above it all. One day these things that used to hurt you will be like arrows bouncing off of a reinforced shield.

"Honor is life - for with no honor one may as well be dead"
Fitness - Cheating. Whether it's in a race or your own training - cheating harms others and yourself. A faster time is not worth sacrificing your integrity. At the end of the day you are truly cheating yourself. You will know deep down that you did not give it 100%.
Life - Being honorable in daily situations will pay off. Maybe not every single time, but each time you act with honor, you set a pathway for all future actions. Tell your spouse the truth about where you're going tonight. Return the wallet to the little old lady who dropped it. If someone did a better job than you at something, don't be a sore loser and congratulate them on a job well done. You will find that over time your good luck increases and you will gain more friends. A person without honor will find themselves all alone in life.

"Loyalty is life - For without one's clan one has no purpose"
Fitness - Embrace a healthy lifestyle. Don't think about it - just go out there and do it. Show up for your workouts, give them 100%, and feel awesome for the rest of your day. Think about what food you put in your mouth. Be LOYAL to your new lifestyle. But don't do all of this at the expense of alienating your friends and family. Go out and do stuff with them even if it takes away from training. Enjoy some good food with them. After all that hard work, these moments are well earned and will be even better.
Life - My advice - choose a small circle of solid family and friends. Don't invest in a relationship if you can't be loyal to that person. Be there for them in their time of need and depend on them during yours. Live out your life to the fullest with the ones you love.

"Death is life - One should die as they have lived"
Fitness - Live on the couch, die on the couch. But a body in motion stays in motion. So you're less likely to die early. Get out there and move. Go outside, run through the woods, feel the wind on your face and smell the flowers. And do epic shit. Go on adventures, see the sights and have a blast. You have been given a body and a life. Use them to have unforgettable experiences.
Life - In addition to physical activity, get the most out of life by taking any opportunity for happiness you can find. Be spontaneous sometimes. See and do as much as you can. Live each day intentionally, and never let yourself become a mindless zombie. Do the things that make you happy - that's what life is all about!


This is probably one of the few times you'll see me get into this much thought on my blog. But this is my philosophy and how I intend on living my life.

The Suffering

So it's the first weekend in a long time where I am NOT racing! How am I spending my time?

Well, last night I went on a spontaneous ice skating adventure! We have this friend that my husband works with and I guess she has been really into ice skating with her quasi-boyfriend, so we joined up with them. And I ice skated for the first time in at least 10 years. It was fun! I'm not amazing at it but I did ok, and more importantly I did not fall on my ass! 

I fully expected my feet and ankles to be furiously sore today, but they aren't sore at all!

I had a nice morning with my husband - breakfast at Cracker Barrel. However - lately there has been this growing, creeping feeling inside me. Frustration. Pent up energy. The need to do STUFF. 

See, the last 2 months have been quite busy for me.

I have run 5 obstacle course races - 

2 Spartan Sprints

1 Warrior Dash

1 Tough Mudder

1 Marine Mud Challenge

And a 10 mile trail race

And I kind of fell into a pattern - race saturday, be sore for 4 days - but then by the time I stop being sore, it's 2 days before my next race and I don't want to be worn out and sore on race morning. Why train? What's the point when I just have another race? I probably shouldn't have done this, but it happened. 

I've kind of been going crazy from lack of exercise. 2 years ago I never thought those words would ever come out of my mouth.

So this afternoon around 2:30 I was fed up. I stood up and proclaimed to my husband "I'm going running."

It's 85 degrees and humid. 'Yall know I can't take the heat. But I didn't care. 

I went out there for 2 laps around my neighborhood. I was sweating before I even started running. I began my run. A neighbor was grilling out and the smell nauseated me. The long, gradual incline at the front half of my neighborhood slowed me down. The heat was setting in. I fought hard to control my breathing, to abstain from taking short and shallow breaths and instead take slow, deep breaths. My head was pounding. That Cracker Barrel breakfast was regretted. Sweat was pouring into my eyes. My legs became heavy. I passed my house once and wanted to stop. But I did not let myself. I finished faster than my last training run which was a month ago.

The whole time, 2 thoughts were repeating in my head. 

"Why am I doing this?"

"I love this!"

When reflecting on the last 2 months and today's experience, I have realized. I love the suffering. I thought back to something Joe Desena (creator of Spartan Race) said - "You have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable" and he pretty much hit the nail on the head. Embrace the pain and suffering. Rise above it and conquer it. I push myself. I am tired, aching, bruised, bleeding, physically and mentally drained, and even scared at times. But in these moments I am free. There is just something about challenging your limits, something about simply getting out and moving the way nature intended, that is just truly liberating. Whatever bullshit you're dealing with in life is gone. It's just you, the great outdoors, and some good old fashioned hard work. And I feel alive. I'm doing what humans were meant to do.

I probably sound crazy and I know it's something few people will understand. But it's who I am. I want to explore, go on adventures, be outside in nature. I want to use and improve the body I have - to push pull, carry, lift, climb, run, and jump. I love having stories to tell. My mission in life - Do epic shit. 

Now I am about to sound even crazier. I have signed up for the Spartan Super in Virginia. 8-10 miles of black diamond ski hills, plus 20 obstacles. This course is BRUTAL. People have said that this course is harder than a Spartan Beast. I'm scared. But I have until August to train. Hills. Walls and ropes. Carrying things. I'm going to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.