Yesterday I realized it's been 10 years since I found Asatru and realized it was the right faith for me. For lots of reasons. I remember questioning Christianity as early as age 8. As I got older I realized it wasn't doing anything for me. I felt no spiritual connection to any of it. So in December 2004 I discovered and chose Asatru. It is closest to the ways of my ancestors. I am half German, my family can be traced back to the Frisians who believed in the same gods. My mother taught me to love and respect nature, and while she is a Christian herself she admitted to me that she believes God is all around her, in nature. This is a very pagan belief and it's one I resonate with much more than the traditional idea of god/s.
Early on after I had found Asatru I was always studying it and learning more about the lore, practicing rituals, meditating, working with runes, celebrating holidays, etc. Over the years I have become pretty lapsed. I rarely do that stuff anymore, though I do have an altar and every now and then I'll need a "moment" with my gods and ancestors. I have developed a very relaxed attitude towards religion in general. I have shifted more towards the attitude my mother has, that the gods are all around us. So what I am these days is closer to Animism I suppose. The most spiritual I feel is when I am outside.
Within the past year I have realized something else. Being active is one of the main ways I practice my faith. My workout time is mine alone. I can clear my mind. In a way I even devote my workouts to the gods. I give my energy as a form of sacrifice. I am inspired by the gods and the stories, to be strong and never give up.
I feel that by doing what I do, I become closer to the gods and to living Asatru. It's all about being the BEST person you can be, every day. I become stronger, develop willpower, become more self reliant, practice discipline, work hard, and increase resilience. I have a strong sense of primal-ness to me. My whole life, part of me has wanted to live in a simpler place and time. Get rid of all this modern stuff. Being active helps me achieve that sense of primal human living. That we are meant to use our bodies - strong, functional bodies. Not just sit around and watch tv all day, using pills and surgeries to keep us alive. We should be healthy and ready for any challenge.
I may no longer practice Asatru as formally as I once did. But I have realized faith is different for everyone, and this is what mine is. It's the feeling I get when I run through the forest...the air moving against my body, the smells of the woods, the ground beneath my feet, the trees, light, and sky. It's my heart pumping and sweat dripping down my temples. Running up hills, through fields. Lifting weights brings out the modern day warrior in me. Obstacle racing is a chance to connect with the primal - running, climbing, jumping, swimming, carrying huge rocks and logs, crawling through mud, etc. All of this is my connection to the divine.
In Asatru, the body is an actual PART of the soul, it's not some detatched entity. I express my gratitude for what I have been given by using it to it's fullest. This is how I honor my gods and ancestors.
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