Deadlift Redemption

10 months ago I experienced an injury.  I was in the gym deadlifting when at the end of my last set I felt a twinge in the left side of my lower back. A few hours later I was in intense pain and had to go home and lie down. Little did I know I'd have to rebuild my entire range of motion in my lower back. Things like sitting down to tie my shoes were impossible. Over the next 2 months I started stretching and getting back into light lifting. My back began to feel better. But still I avoided deadlifting until summer of this year. I began working with a coach to help me. We fixed my form and progressed weight slowly as I began to feel more comfortable with it again. Things went well for the most part, my persistently angry left hamstring made things challenging at times but we've been working on alot of hamstring and glute strengthening. I have learned much.

After 3 months of deadlifting I was at the week of my 30th birthday which could only mean one thing - PR week!

Here I am on Friday staring down these deadlifts again. On my 29th birthday I got a 205lb deadlift. One year later, after having to rebuild myself back from negative nothing, what could I get? I know I could get more than 205 because I have been doing sets of 4-5 reps at 195. So I warmed up, belted up, and put 205 on the bar. Easy. Up to 215. Still easy. So now up to 225 which was kind of my soft goal, seeing as how I squatted that on Wednesday. I wanna be able to at least deadlift the same amount if not more. Daniel got the camera out for some video. 225 happened... so now the question was, go for 235? Let's do it. Wiggle into position, grip the bar... deep breath, squeeze glutes and lats... and this was one slow, ugly mofo of a lift but it happened. But of course, Daniel didnt' get it on video cause his hand was in the way or something. And you know video makes everything official so I had to do it again :)  I set up and got it a few inches off the ground, it wasn't happening again. So it appears right now 235 is my 1RM. And I'm fine with that. This is my worst lift and I am basically starting over with it, so this is good for right now. I know where I'm at and I can start working my way up to 250+ from here.

It feels good to be deadlifting again. It's still hard as hell. It freaking wears me out every time. And I know it's never gonna get any easier... but I'll get better

Confidently strong

It's Thursday morning... a rest day! I am enjoying it after 3 days in a row of crushing it in the gym

I am so happy to have my binder. Why didn't I make one sooner? I am logging every exercise I do - how much weight and every rep. In 3 weeks I can see where my gains are happening. Furthermore, if I am really tired and want to cut corners this helps me do all my reps - because if I write them down and didn't actually do all of them I'll feel like I cheated. 

#175 with squats was a bit too easy last week. #50's for dumbbell bench. Heavy Turkish Get Ups were done too. I am also making huge improvements with push ups and pull ups now that I am doing them twice a week. Yesterday I got 11, 9, 7, 6 with pull ups and that's the best yet. I think when I can do 4 sets of 10 I will start using the purple band. I got some heavy pulling done with #120 too. The gains are real!!

The Black Hats are starting to notice me more too. Jason kept making comments about how inspiring I am and how he'd love to have me on the MMA side. And that was cool, because anyone can do MMA as long as they sign up/pay for it, but it was almost like a personal invitation. There's a new trainer and I think his name is Sean, we talked for a good while on Monday and then on Tuesday I saw him messing around with the grip trainer. It's these little metal cylinders that hang down off the top of our racks and you can grab them and hold on, do pull ups, etc. to improve your grip. I messed around on these things with my husband like 3 months ago and I couldn't even really grab onto them. So this guy is like "Come on over and try it!" I put a box up to it so I could step up and see how many pull ups I could do. I honestly had no idea what to expect - could I even do 1 at all? Got 2! They ain't easy, I could feel my back working so much harder to pull myself up while hanging on to the unstable grips. Then I took the box away and jumped for the grips. I had my hands on them and let go. He was like "Why did you let go?" I said I dunno, I didn't think I was actually gonna make it. He said "Maybe that's what happened right there" So I tried again, jumped up and got a perfect grip then pulled myself up for 1 jumping pull up. I wasn't expecting to do any of this today and I had no idea I was capable of it. Last time I tried was so abysmal and today I rocked out 3 pull ups on it. Yes I have gotten stronger since then but so much of it is mental. Like if you watch American Ninja Warrior and see someone who looks afraid they usually end up failing because they psych themselves out. If you're confident and trust your body to do what it knows how to do, you're much more likely to succeed. Sean decided to use the bars that affix the rack to the wall and swing across them. They are really far apart so they can't be monkey barred, you have to get a big swing and use momentum to reach the next bar. There are like 10 of these and during one of his attempts he almost made it all the way across. It was cool to watch and cheer him on. No way am I ready for that though, especially not with stacks of weights and foam rollers and shit underneath me!

This week I definitely turned some heads while deadlifting and doing sprints on the turf. I don't really know why, all I do is work hard in the gym.

Oh, I got my deadlifts at #195 for sets yesterday. Next Wednesday is the last session I have with Daniel. It happens to be my birthday, so we are maxing out to celebrate. Can I get 210? 215? 225? We will find out!

The hands that lift

Phew.. I am tired after a long day of appointments and errands. It all started at 7am with the gym though... Heavy deads, some sets of 185 and then 195 until I couldn't go anymore. I did really well with pull ups today and hit some new weights - 100lbs on pulldown, 35 face pulls, and used the 44 lb kettlebell for swings today. I had quite a strong morning I'd say!

My hands paid for it though, ripped open my left hand AGAIN! My calluses keep peeling off and tearing. I don't want to pick at them but I can't very well leave them hanging there either. So I did some research into this and ordered a hand balm that should help with this. I also learned that filing down the rough edges should help protect them from peeling and tears. I also should be moisturizing more, I do this already but I guess it's not enough. 

Left hand damage :(

I got a filer thingy that has a pumice stone on it and some hand scrub from Lush, used both today and it seems to have helped. I can't touch the open area with the filer yet but in a few days I'll sand down all the rough edges and hopefully end these problems!

We had a nice run/walk today, and I say run first because my husband ran 2 entire laps around the lake! He normally does 1/2 a lap before he has to stop. I wore my Garmin today and was happy to see my pace in the 10's and sub 10's. During our walk on Monday something crazy happened... we saw these 3 guys on bicycles and a fourth guy lying down off the path. We ran over because we knew something was wrong. Turns out the 3 bikers found this guy passed out on the path and during this moment the ambulance sirens could be heard and we ran up the path to direct the EMT's to the scene. This kid couldn't have been older than 18-20 and he was passed out, pale as a ghost, and not moving. A needle was found at the scene so this was obviously an OD. We watched the EMT's do their work from a distance and they eventually got him out of there and told us he'd survive. It was a crazy thing to see, I had never experienced anything like that aside from seeing people in the hospital where you expect to see them sick anyway, but seeing a body not moving and pale as death was very sad. I only hope this kid has a family who loves him and will help him get better. 

Anyway, enough for tonight. I am very tired and tomorrow will be another action packed day

When I'm too hard on myself

It's Thursday, and I'm finally getting back to normal. It took me about a week to get back into the gym due to being ill last week - then on top of that, over the weekend I had girl troubles and also ran out of my blood pressure meds. I felt like shit on Sunday and had to go 3 more days without my meds. Seems like everything falls apart at once sometimes.

Yesterday was my first time back in the gym and it happened to be a deadlift day. We had 1 hour to work with because I missed last week, so at the end we worked on pull ups and some other accessory stuff.

Ever look back on yourself and say "Wow, I was really acting like a douche!" Well that was me yesterday. I was really down on myself in the gym and made alot of comments about how all this stuff was wrong with me right now, how I need to lose weight to get back to where I used to be with pull ups, and while we were doing some lunges my knee started to hurt so that launched a discussion about the various "broken" parts of my body. I felt so tired - my heart was racing and I thought it was about to pop out of my chest. Not having my meds was taking a huge toll. I felt like a weakling struggling to get through this workout which wasn't even anything too crazy challenging aside from the deads. After I left the gym I realized what a whiny little bitch I must have sounded like. I guess it's easy to be your own worst enemy when life doesn't go smoothly. And I am particularly hard on myself, my entire life I have struggled with self esteem issues and as my husband puts it "kicked my own ass before I even started the fight". Yesterday I realized something. No, I may not be lifting as heavy as I want to right now, but I am back where I was 1 year ago when this picture below was taken - I had just gotten my first big PR of 185.

That gym had tiny ass bumper plates but yes, it's 185

Yesterday I did it 3 times and probably could have gone another set - my limiting factor was grip because a week of not doing anything caused my calluses to peel off. This weight was challenging but doable. And best of all, I am having no pain at my injury site. I am feeling it in all the right places as opposed to before when my form was all wrong. Yes, I may be too hard on myself, but I'm making progress. Could I pull 205 on my birthday again this year? Yes, and I'll probably try for 215 at least. 230 is possible with time and training. And while I feel like I've been stuck in the same place forever, I am still pretty strong. When I feel like I'm overweight people always remind me I'm in decent shape. This week I had THREE people ask what my sport was because I looked "strong" or in "good shape" and one person asked me if I was a swimmer - yes, I used to be!

I just realized I gotta cut this short and get over to the gym for bootcamp... so until next time ....

Busy week

Man, what a week.

Last Saturday we sold our house and bought a car on the same day! We now have 2 Jeeps, my husband got this crazy fully loaded Wrangler (and I still have my Patriot) and he totally loves it. I am not so crazy about the price but he has worked his ass off so he wanted to treat himself.

And in new developments, we once again might be moving back to GA! My husband is interviewing with other companies since he isnt' 100% happy with his and they don't have any positions down there. He has 2 interviews so far with possibly more on the way, there are a shit ton of positions open so we're cautiously optimistic that this will happen.

I kinda took a few days off from exercise, I guess I was tired and just needed to sleep in. But now I'm back full force

- Got my pull/deadlift day, those heavy deads wore me out. I didn't eat much the night before and I felt the consequences. Last week my injury site hurt a bit after deadlift day, but this week I have no problems. The morning after my glutes were even just the slightest bit sore - it's nearly impossible to make mine feel sore, the only exercise I have found that does is single leg squats.

- Ran yesterday morning and sprinted at the end
- Got a double because my husband wanted to go to the gym that afternoon. I just did a bunch of full body stuff, 5 sets of clean/press, and also Turkish get ups, snatches, burpees, and jump rope.

- I am about to go do my leg and push day!

I am SUPER tired. On top of being busy with life stuff/exercise I also just survived 5 incredibly busy days at work.

After the gym/errands/shoe clinic at work, I will probably come home, eat Chipotle, watch Spartan Team Challenge and pass out on the couch :)

2 weeks

I have been at it for a couple weeks now - watching what I eat and restricting calories for fat loss.

I'm down 9 lbs and 1% body fat (sitting at 26%). I dig it... thinking I'd like to see 24 or below.

So far I'm doing alright with food, I eat "bad" every now and then but I try not to go overboard with portions, and I don't give in to every single solitary craving like I used to. Some days I feel more "fat" than others, but one of the coaches at the gym made a comment about how he's already noticed me getting leaner :)

This week so far it's been bootcamp, 2 mile run, and lifting this morning. We're deadlifting on Wednesdays now, today it was 3 sets of 175x5. We upped the reps by 2 and it's challenging at this weight, but next week we're moving up to 185. Also did some other back/pull exercises before heading off to a tech session at work. Tomorrow I will run another 2 miles and then do some sprints at the end.

I'm in somewhat less pain than last week. For some reason everything was acting up at the same time, but I must have slept real good last night cause today I woke up and the hamstring was much better. Feet, knee, and shoulders are ok. The right ankle and shin are a bit sore, but I think it's cause I ran yesterday and today I just felt it when jumping rope and such.

Some days it feels like I'm not progressing at all, but today's body fat results and progress pics gave me relief and showed me I am seeing some improvement. And I have to keep reminding myself that I've been through all this before and that it's a really slow process. Change comes in time :)

Resetting

It's now been a week and a half since I started restricting calories to lose some extra blub. While on vacation I realized clothes fit differently than last summer, I looked different in pictures, and when I got back I stepped on the scale and I did not like it at all...

Since the initial weigh in I have lost about 8 lbs. I think most of it is bloat but hey, it's 8 lbs. I also measured myself one week ago and then again today. I've always had a pot belly so the largest part of my belly is a measurement I'm tracking, and in a week I have lost .5 inches off there.

My diet is better now, and I've stuck to it for the most part. I'm surprisingly not as hungry as I thought I'd be, there was really only one day when I was super hungry and kinda fell off the rails a bit. But I've been down this road before and I know stuff like that is going to happen. I don't have to be perfect 100% of the time, but as long as I do the right things most of the time the change will occur.

Lifting hasn't changed a whole lot, I'm just not going crazy heavy all the time right now aside from the deadlift. I am hitting reps with 175 there and not having any problems. Yesterday in fact I felt pretty strong with it. I'm doing bootcamp twice a week and running 1-2 times a week. Certain muscles are cranky, the bad hamstring is acting up right now but I'm stretching/massaging and it helps. The calves are also angry but they will get used to running again. As far as bootcamp goes, I wore my watch the last 2 times and was a little underwhelmed at the result. It shows calories burned around 380 for both classes. I thought it would be like 500+. Oh well, that's why I got the watch... now I know not to overeat. I am going to experiment with the watch a bit though, because both times I left it running the whole time and there are parts where we rest and where the coach walks us through each station. I wonder if pausing it during rest will give a different result. We shall see.

Back from vacation, down to business

Alot's happened in my little world since I last checked in.

Last week we took a little vacation in Outer Banks. We went for like 4 days and spent most of our time fishing and hitting the pool. He is a saltwater fisher, I have done it a little but could never really get into it. Well, when we first got onto the island we hit up TW's tackle and while there he picked out a fishing rod just for me. So now after 13 years I finally have my own rod. On the second day there were a ton of Spade fish messing with my bait. I had a typical bottom rig and they just kept on stealing my bait! This meant war! So my husband made the most ridiculous rig with 4 gigantic hooks. And I caught 3 that day. The last day he taught me how to jig and I managed to catch a Spanish Mackerel and proceeded to rub it in his face (not literally) because it's his favorite thing to catch. Here's my very first fish on MY new rod

The trip was relaxing and awesome. We didn't spend any time on the beach but my husband was battling his foot pain, upset stomach, not being on his meds due to a dr. mix up, and a really bad sunburn. But of course we did tons of silly stuff like this

Booty Treats! This is an ice cream place that's been around for years and we always made fun of the name/sign that has a turd like object on it... but we finally tried it. It was alright, there are better places on the island IMO, but it's BOOTY TREATS! And of course I had to do a squat with the sign. Ice cream + Squats = BOOTY!

I wore a little dress too, and this is super rare so we took an obligatory pic of that.

So we got back and slowly adjusted to reality. Tuesday was Deadlift day #4, we're picking up the weight (literally) and I moved up to 175. Think I did like 3 or 4 sets of 3 reps here. It's getting challenging, I can definitely feel the effects of the weight and my grip isn't what it used to be. Apart from being sore everything feels fine. The main things I'm working on are getting my chest up faster and trying to "push my heels through the floor". Next week I'll try a set or 2 at 185

Yesterday I went to bootcamp and it was a Daniel class. His classes are just brutal. He tends to run you outside and have you do lots of bear crawls and burpees. This time we didn't do our usual "break up into squads and rotate between stations" we were all together the whole time. It went something like this

Burpee ladder (10, 9, 8...) with a run outside in between each set. I got to 8 before time was called
**In between each thing we did an ab circuit - 20 V ups, 20 sit ups, 20 alt. toe touches**
20 Kettlebell swings, walking lunge across the turf, run outside. 2 rounds
ABS
10 Box jumps, 10 ball slams, run outside. 2 rounds
ABS
10 Wall Balls, bear crawl across turf, run outside. I think I got 3 rounds here. **Important note - My wall ball STUNK. I got one of the 2 black and red 14 pounders because most of the other women wanted the lighter ones. Someone must have spent some time hugging this thing because it was nasty. Every time I threw it I got a whiff :(
ABS
10 rope slams, 20 power jacks, run outside. 2 rounds
ABS

Then we repeated the whole thing but we just ran up and down the turf 3 times instead of going outside.

So brutal. The whole class was just whipped. I sweat alot no matter what, but the level of sweat on me after this was pretty epic.

Finally, I'm cutting some weight. Recently I've come to realize how much weight I've put back on. I look different in pictures and clothes fit differently. And it hit me how bad I've been over the past several months. Have I been active? Yes, lifting and bootcamp several times a week with occasional running. But have I been eating right and mindfully so? Have I been running enough? Have I been acting with purpose? No. I've pretty much been eating whatever I want whenever I want, lots of eating out and ordering food out of laziness. I can't justify it, and I'm starting to see the effects and even feel them in the gym. I need to drop some pudge because it will help me be more efficient in the gym, get more pull ups in, and be a faster runner. I also just want to get better at everything and getting rid of some baggage will help. This week I've been cutting calories and eating with a purpose - trying to get my macros right and cooking dinner at home. I've lost a couple pounds but I have about 23 left.

To help me out, I got a new Fitbit Blaze! It just got here yesterday and I already started tinkering with it. I'm familiar with them because I have a Charge non-HR, but I wanted to get this one because it can track workouts like weightlifting and bootcamp, and the HR feature will give me a better picture of how hard I'm actually working. It'll give me the best picture of how much to eat in accordance with what I've done that day. Actually I am about to go test it out and lift with it in a little bit. I am expecting 150-200 calories burned in a typical session.

That was a mouthful, but it's been like 2 weeks worth of stuff to catch up on. Time to get ready to smash some weight around

Deadlift Training - Day 2

Oh my gosh. This week has been nuts!

Tuesday morning was DL session #2! It went really well. I was hella sore from Monday's exertions but I did not let that stop me. Warm up was a little different this time, again with glute bridges but we threw some single leg variations in there. I did 4 part walk outs that I can't really explain over text, but they opened up the hips and stretched the hamstrings. More stretches to activate the glutes and a special foam rolling technique too. Today I worked with #155, so we're getting close to my sticking point where in the past the lift hasn't felt right. But this time everything felt good. The higher hip position felt a little less alien this time. At times I am still struggling with picking up my hips at the wrong time but it's slowly getting better. I am thinking maybe next week working with #175. During these next 3 months I wanna work my way up to finally pulling some big weight.

I'm so tired. I realized that I exercised 3 times in 24 hours. 9:30 class on Monday, afternoon lifting, 7:30 DL training. I did alot of new, intense movements and did all the major lifts. And get this, my husband wants to go lift again this afternoon. Killin me!!!! Ahhh but I can't turn it down. It may be brutal and exhausting but I love it. And I'm really happy he wants to work out because getting him motivated doesn't always happen. I am going to caffeinate myself heavily for work today, I was dragging ass yesterday but my boss came to the rescue with an energy drink.

I'm gonna sleep so hard.

Deadlift Training - Day 1

Yesterday was my first session with Daniel - all about deadlifting!

Going into it I knew I had crappy hips and hamstrings and knew that would be part of the problem. So we did some tests of mobility and stability. My stability isn't bad but yeah, back and hips are pretty terrible. We did a few exercises to warm up and activate my glutes and hamstrings.

30 second hang on the pull up bar with heels on a box (sinking into my hips and stretching out the lats)
Ball hamstring curls
Hip thrusts on a bench with a hold
Hip thrusts on the ground/elevated knee
Toe touches with my toes elevated on plates
Some stretching and practice DL's with the PVC pipe

Now, the moment of truth. How terrible was my deadlift? Well, part of the problem is I was starting out way too low to the ground. The starting position was so much higher than what I'm used to and at first it didn't feel right, it felt like I was about to fall forward because I was more horizontal to the ground. So I started with my hips high and out. Now here's the other big part - squeezing the glutes and the LATS. I guess I always used to just sort of pick up the bar, when it's really so much more than that. Engaging those muscles, specifically the lats was a totally different feeling for me. Then I picked up the bar, and on the descent he wanted me to go slow and let the bar travel along my thighs and shins, then once it passed my knee bend the knee and lower the bar all the way. This was all with only #75 on the bar, I kept the weight light because I am essentially re-learning how to deadlift. It felt totally different than what I had been doing in the past, but in a good way.

Today I am sore in my lats/traps, a little bit in the hamstrings, and in my hips. Lower back feels ok. I didn't go heavy but I used totally different muscles. I also have tiny bruises on my shins already. I go back on Tuesday and I'm gonna increase my weight and see how it all goes.